Working with Words

Tips for a Happy Holiday (Letter)!

Let me cut to the chase—what makes a good holiday letter? First and foremost, it reflects the personality of the writer or writers. (And don’t make the mistake of writing as though you are the omniscient author looking down from on high.) Refer to yourself as “I” and family members by name. If you can get each of them to add a sentence or paragraph, great! Head the paragraph with their name and add a photo, and they can speak from the “I” as well.

Second: It’s short. If you include photos, it might extend to two pages; without photos keep it to one. Tell about what really matters to you. If you enjoyed your trip to Provence, highlight the stellar moment instead of creating a travel brochure.

Third: Don’t send it to everyone. Only your family and friends who don’t live nearby want this information. Acquaintances and people you see often will be happy with a personal phone call or a card with a short handwritten note.

Fourth: If you mention people outside your immediate family, remind readers who they are. The same goes for places. My friends in California have no idea where Boone, NC is.

Fifth: Avoid listing your own or family members’ accomplishments as if you won Family (or Person) of the Year. Tell your friends about your promotion, but don’t brag on your raise. To avoid sounding arrogant, be specific. What is the one thing you like about your new position (besides the raise) and what is the biggest challenge for you? Avoid complaints too—focus on the dance, not on who stepped on your toes.

Other thoughts: If you’ve had a bad year, your holiday letter can help you find the diamond inside the coal. A friend invited to speak of her personal experience to survivors of breast cancer made a list of all the “bad” things that had happened. Her husband had died, she was diagnosed with breast cancer, her father died, and so on and on. For each calamity she found a lesson and a blessing. Another friend writes a letter to her partner every year listing all the high points and appreciations. As you can imagine, these aren’t financial successes but are things like watching the sunrise from Mt. Pisgah. To make your letter a little off beat, make these lists: what made you laugh, what moments did you treasure, what new friends did you make or skill did you acquire. List a few of your favorite things—you developed a taste for escargot or finally got the nerve to walk across the suspension bridge on Grandfather Mountain.

Although it’s definitely not de rigeur, I usually send my letters out between January 1 and February 14. The first time this was the result of procrastination. Now I choose it. Since I’ve adopted this approach, my recipients know to wait before assuming I’ve died. My reason for waiting is that they will receive it when they have time to read it, and I will write it when I have time to do a good job. Since I usually insert two to four photos in the text, one for each “item,” waiting means the holiday family shot was actually taken on the most recent holiday. You can even turn your favorite holiday photo into a stamp at photo.stamps.com.

Peggy Tabor Millin       Copyright 2007